What the *** is wrong with *****!!!!!

~Black eyed peas Anxiety

I feel like I wanna smack somebodyTurn around and bitch slap somebodyBut I ain't goin' out bro (no, no, no)I ain't givin' into it (no, no, no)Anxieties bash my mind inTerrorizing my soul like Bin LadenBut I ain't fallin' down bro (no, no, no)I won't lose control bro (no, no, no)Shackle and chainedMy soul feels stainedI can't explain got an ich on my brainLately my whole aim is to maintainAnd regain control of my mainframeMy bloods boiling its beatin' out propaineMy train of thoughts more like a runaway trainI'm in a fast car drivin' in a fast laneIn the rain and I'm might just hydroplaineI don't fear none of my enemiesAnd I don't fear bullets from ooziesI've been dealing with something thats worse than theseThat'll make you fall to your knees and thats theThe anxiety the sane and the insane rivalryParanoias brought me to my kneesLord please please pleaseTake away my anxietyThe sane and the insane rivalryParanoias brought me to my kneesLord please please pleaseTake away my anxiety.............................

Emotional Detachment.

Once again i am back to this topic of emotional attachment v.s emotional detachment. This week's sermon topic was really speaking out to me. I felt really touched by the word. As if it was directed at me. But i know how God's word reaches out to all of us at the same time. Sister JerBlinn was talking about how human beings get disappointed with things, with events and in the worst case, disappointment with other people. I think that is so true! The worst scenario is for friends and people that we love to disappoint us or when they do not meet our expectations. Think all my life i have been such a perfectionist that i do not realize that others may also be perfectionists and demand the same kind of things that i do. Sometimes i feel that i am so alone and that nobody thinks like the way i do but in fact, alot of Christians are like me. We demand the best from others and even ourselves. But how come nobody seems to realize that we are just human? We can never be perfect and we can never make the kind of sacrifice that Jesus did for us. But the scary thing is that whenever i have issues in my mind, the message will definitely speak out to me! How amazing God is! He knows the desires of our hearts indeed. The only way to deal with disappointments in life is to constantly seek God. Cause most often than not, there is actually really no solution to our problems. We can ask why umpteen times to God, to our friends, to our parents to the people we love but very often we get no answer or solution. How then can we get out of this rut which we often get ourselves into? Why does the best situations always turn for the worse? Is change really inevitable in life? Why can't we exist in the best situations forever and feel no pain nor hurt. Such is the reality of life. People get really fake sometimes when they feel jealous of one another. It's like a world where only the toughest survive and the weakest will slowly but surely get eliminated. Kinda hate the long working hours that i have right now but i don't feel that i'm particularly busy. Just tired. Hmm. Shd invest more in health products. Even my bro got the chicken pox. Something's really wrong in my life right now but i just can't lay a finger on it. Mayb i just need a change of environment like a holiday or something. I need block leave!